Love In Action!!

This is a story about what happened a couple of years ago (2005). Every time I saw the prayers and  of George Michael's fans and and the many, many 'please get well George' comments in the comments section of the UK tabloids (yay!), the moving story of this American boy popped into my mind. What do these two people, a typical American teenager, and a British popstar almost thirty years his senior have in common? Being loved! Being loved by someone who has never met you, but who still wants to help in some small way. Because sometimes you just can't stay silent. Love is God. 

What do you think of when you hear the words 'Love in Action'? I'll bet you didn't think of young kids being locked away somewhere against their will, being robbed both of their freedom and the right to be who they are. And yet this is exactly what a 'Christian' organisation called Love In Action used to do. They changed a bit, they no longer hold teenage kids against their will, sadly the other part is still more or less true.

You see Love In Action was - and still is - one of those 'let's cure the gays' groups. All mainstream psychiatrist and psychologists agree that changing a person's sexual orientation is near to impossible. What you can do however is pressure or bully someone into changing their sexual behaviour (i.e. become celibate) and claim they have now left the 'sinful gay lifestyle'. Of course many of these 'cured' men and women become quite unhappy and self-loathing. What they certainly don't become is straight!

Why we need George Michael speaking out about gay issues

This is the second part in a series about fighting homophobia. The first part is here. 


It takes a village. Raising a kid and teaching them about life, that is. And one of the things we need to teach our kids is that being different is just fine!

There's a school of thought in the gay community that only 'safe' and squeaky-clean men and women should speak out about gay issues or become gay activists. George Michael would be the first to admit that his image is anything but clean. A very public outing, problems with drugs, a stint in prison, the facts speak for themselves. So George needn't apply. But I don't agree: we need everyone! Isn't that what equality & diversity is all about anyway?

Fighting homophobia with education

This is the first blog post in a series about educating our kids about diversity and gay rights. I try to do my little bit, and of course I was inspired by a certain mister Michael to become actively involved. Heh, it's amazing to me how this one man I never met has inspired me to do things I never knew I could do and discover hidden talents along the way.

As some of you may know I'm in involved with our Dutch LGBT organisation, COC. I'm a member of their education group (in Dutch: voorlichtingsgroep). This is what we do: a team of 2 members of our group goes to a high school (by invitation only of course) and we become substitute teachers for a day. We teach a class about gay rights, or rather we don't teach so much as we use our expertise to let the kids teach themselves about gay rights. Teenagers are usually quite bright, if you encourage them to think things through, they can usually come up with the answers themselves.

From twitter rant to tabloid fodder

George Michael is back to his 'foulmouthed ranting self' on twitter as he predicted a few weeks ago. That's our George, such a charming way with (naughty) words! And how nice is it to see him back on twitter getting worked up about something or other. He really is getting better!

A light for George Michael

Some of George Michael's fans are lighting a candle every day as an act of prayer for him. I do this too, and have done it ever since the news came that he was very ill. Thank God that the news about George is quite good now and his doctors as well as his close friends tell us he is improving. Nevertheless he is in my thoughts and prayers every day. 

A simple light, a silent prayer.

A Flawless Wedding

This is the last of the blog posts of the blog I started a week before my wedding. I didn't keep a copy of the other posts, which I kinda regret now. I remember blogging the night before our wedding, all nervous and happy. And I posted a very short post on the morning of the wedding, just before the make-up girl came to work her magic on us!

I still love our wedding rings!

Only six days to go till "I do". Maria and I are getting more nervous by the day. It’s a big thing for both us. If you’re gay getting married is like the ultimate coming out and it turns out it’s not for the faint of heart. Only yesterday we were telling each other if we’d known what we were getting ourselves into we might at least have reconsidered or just been too terrified to go through with it.

Openly Gay

Openly and gay: it should be against the law to put these two words next to each other.

Mr. X., the openly gay singer, or less frequently (heh) Mr. Y, the openly gay actor.; words cannot express how much I hate stuff like that. By saying that someone is openly gay, you're implying that this is noteworthy and strange. As if loving someone of the same sex is so outrageous, that people should only be allowed to be secretly gay. It makes being gay sound incredibly shameful and sleazy. You might just as well say Mr. X,  self-confessed sleazebag, or Mr. Y, brazenly gay.

Using phrases like openly gay is dangerous because it perpetuates the myth that there is something inherently sleazy or shameful about being gay. And there isn’t. 

I wish people would get it into their heads that being gay – as much as being straight – isn’t about sex. It’s about loving someone with all your heart and wanting to spend the rest of your life with him or her. And it really isn't important  if this person happens to have the same number of X chromosomes as you do.

It's Gay Pride Time!

Canal Parade 2010

Happy Gay Pride everyone!

Today it's party time in Amsterdam, with the the yearly Canal Parade, the culmination of the Amsterdam Gay Pride week. Almost a hundred colourful little and big boats (floats) with GLBT and straight people 'parade' through the canals of Amsterdam. And for one day only our capital is once again the Gay Capital of Europe.

The Canal Parade is one of the biggest outdoor events of Amsterdam.
This celebration of diversity is one big outdoor party and everyone is invited. You wouldn't believe how many straight families visit Amsterdam on the first Saturday in August to join in the fun. And why not? The Canal Parade is great - and for the most part clean - fun!

Oh, I know the media make out as if every boat is filled from top to bottom (heh) with naked guys, but that is a big fat lie.
Yes, some some boats are decidedly sexy. It takes all kinds <shrug>. And if people want to go wild for just one day a year, I say: "Go for it!" (remember these topless guys are really toned and very easy on the eyes).
Besides, there is much more naked flesh on display at the yearly Summer Carnival in Rotterdam, but somehow nobody complains about that. I hate subtle homophobia like that.

Watching all the boats go by can be quite emotional. It's like watching the history of the Dutch gay rights movement being acted out before your very eyes.

I'm always happy when I see a company pride boat. It's a public declaration that gay bullying won't be tolerated in that company.
This year V&D (a large department store), PostNL (Dutch Mail), ING Bank (our biggest bank), Nederlandse Spoorwegen (Dutch Rail), the Dutch Police, newcomers Department of Defence and many others all participate with a company pride boat. Yay!

It took ages before members of the Dutch armed forces were allowed to participate in uniform, but a few years ago it finally happened. I had to blink away tears when I spotted them in the boat of the Dutch Police (they weren't allowed to put up their own float back then), waving enthusiastically, taking it all in. That was a huge step forward. And this year they even have their very own float!

And finally there are the boats of the human rights groups, reminding everyone how blessed we are over here because we are free to organise an event like the Amsterdam Gay Pride. There are far too many places in the world, some of them close by, where gays and lesbians are fired from their jobs, put out of their houses, threatened with violence or even put in jail for being who they are. Let's keep working to change all that.

Maybe there's hope

Well, maybe there is hope after all.

A few weeks ago George Michael reacted to the whole phone hacking scandal on twitter. Not a very wise thing to do perhaps. But after all the abuse he's had to endure by them and other tabloids over the years he'd have to been inhuman not to gloat a bit now they are the ones in trouble.

Anyway, of course his little rant was reported by the media, lazy journalism being alive and well. I was dreading the response of the 'general public'. Whenever there's a story about GM there always comments that amount to nothing more than barely disguised homophobia.
This time was no exception. But - and this is truly cause for celebration - for once people came to his defence  Regular people, not rabid fans!

So maybe the winds are changing just a little bit. We've still got a long way to go but things are definitely changing.